Funny Redneck Jokes Biography
Source (Google.com.pk)
you might be a Redneck
A night on the town includes city jail.
All of your relatives' cars have "Tag Stolen" signs in the rear window.
All of your relatives would have to die to wipe out illiteracy.
All your tupperware is old butter containers.
All your wall decorations have horns on them.
All your wedding guests were seated on the same side of the church.
Any of your children are the result of a conjugal visit.
Anything outside the Lower 48 is "overseas."
At the dog track, you always bet on the dog that "does his business" right before the race starts.
Counting sheep makes you more aroused than sleepy.
Coworkers start a petition over your coffee cup.
Directions to your house include "turn off the paved road."
Drying your clothes depends on the weather.
During your wedding ceremony the minister said, "Do you, DeWayne, take Connie to be your old lady?"
Every room in your house is a junk room.
Every workday ends with the same argument about who gets to ride in the cab of the truck.
Everyone in the house learns something from the potty training videotape.
For your anniversary you take your wife to dinner at the Wal-Mart snack bar.
It's midnight and everyone on your street knows what album you're playing.
It takes an entire dumpster to clean out your car.
Most of your family have appeared on COPS.
Neither your nor your husband's job requires you to wear a shirt to work.
No matter which side of the track you live on, it's the wrong side.
Nobody can rebuild an engine like mama.
None of the tires on your car are the same size.
On stag night, you take a real deer.
One of your top concerns is going to the electric chair.
People are scared to touch your bathrobe.
People hear your car a long time before they see it.
Somebody hollers "Hoe Down" and your girlfriend hits the floor.
Someone asks to see your marriage license and you have to dig through the back floorboard of the G.T.O.
Someone says that your mother wears army boots and you say, "So?"
The "Save Naugahyde" protection group chooses your house as a picket site.
The beer truck delivers door-to-door in your neighborhood.
The biggest sign on your place of business says "Minnows!"
The cleaners inform you that they can't get the sweat stains out.
The cockroaches left you a note saying, "Clean this place up!"
The cottage cheese container in your refrigerator holds night crawlers.
The dishwasher and your wife are one and the same.
The dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
The highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
The hood of your truck is higher than the roof of your house.
The last thing you read was a syphilis pamphlet at the clinic.
The liquor store knows you by your first name.
The man from the power company threatens to cut off your service, and you threaten to cut off something of his in return.
The morning after your kids' slumber party, the dogs have fleas.
The National Guard had to be called out to your last family reunion.
The oil stain on your driveway looks like the result of a tanker spill.
The only scales in your bathroom are leftovers from the fish cleaning.
The original color of your carpet is an unsolved mystery.
The police regularly come to your house to break up a fight, and you live alone.
The primary color of your car is Bond-O.
The quality of your birthday present depends on how mama finishes in the wet t-shirt contest.
The school principal has your number on speed dial.
The sound of a siren sends your family running for the woods.
The strongest smell in your house is butane.
The tires on your car don't fit under your fenders.
There are engine parts on your coffee table.
There are more than 4 hats in the rear window of your car.
There are more than five McDonald's bags currently on the floorboard of your car.
There is a hot water bottle hanging from your shower curtain.
There is a puddle in your driveway year-round.
There is more oil in your baseball cap than in your car.
There is not room for one more bumper sticker on your car.
There is the equivalent of 3 large orders of fries scattered on the floorboard of your car.
Three weeks after the circus, you're still talking about the elephant's accident.
Trick-or-treaters are scared to come to your door.
Trimming your beard requires lawn equipment.
Turning on your lights involves pulling a string.
When paying for beer, spare pistol shells fall out of your pocket.
You're considered an expert on worm beds.
You've ever backed down an exit ramp.
You've ever been accused of lying through your tooth.
You've ever been arrested for loitering.
You've ever been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.
You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
You've ever been on television not wearing a shirt.
You've ever borrowed chewing tobacco from your wife.
You've ever committed a crime with a lawn mower.
You've ever eaten out of a minnow bucket.
You've ever freshened up with a Slim Jim.
You've ever given yourself a social disease.
You've ever had hot flashes at a cattle auction.
You've ever had sex while wearing work gloves.
You've ever had to turn your truck around because of bridge clearance restrictions.
You've ever hit a deer with your car... deliberately.
You've ever hitchhiked naked.
You've ever hollered, "You kids quit playing on that sheet metal."
You've ever made love on top of a dog house.
You've ever plucked a nose hair with a pair of pliers.
You've ever read the entire Sunday paper sitting in the bathroom.
You've ever rolled your riding lawn mower.
You've ever stood outside a bathroom and heckled someone who was inside.
You've ever thrown a tailgate party at a tractor pull.
You've ever used a laundromat as a mailing address.
You've ever used panty hose as a coffee filter.
You've ever walked through a drive-thru window.
You've ever watched the game warden through your scope.
You've ever water-skied in your underwear.
You've ever worn camouflage pants to church.
You've never made up your bed.
You've never paid for a haircut.
You've never stayed in a hotel without stealing something.
You've seen Walking Tall more than 50 times.
You've talked to your mama on the C.B., but have never met her in person.
You've totaled every car you've owned.
You always answer the door with a baseball bat in your hand.
You always use tape to hem your pants.
You applied for a job while wearing a stocking cap.
You burn out your clutch in a funeral procession.
You burn trash in your Sunday clothes.
You buy a police scanner to keep up with your relatives.
You buy lard wholesale.
You call the operator to get the number for 911.
You can't spell your name without looking at your belt.
You can distinguish between the taste of 'possum and groundhog, blindfolded.
You can do a moose mating call from an orifice other than your mouth.
You can drink beer through your nose.
You can eat a McDonald's cheeseburger in one bite.
You can field dress a deer, but can't change a diaper.
You can name the entire cast of The Dukes of Hazzard, but not your congressman.
You can readily describe the taste of squirrel.
You can take your bra off while driving.
You carried a fishing pole into Sea World.
You check your shirt to spell your name.
You clean your hands daily with gasoline.
You consider a spotlight hunting equipment.
You cried the day your son tapped his first keg.
You develop a 1 to 10 warning system for your intestinal gas attacks.
You don't recognize several relatives when they're sober.
You drew "horns" on your new bride in your wedding pictures.
You drive 600 miles to see an image of Elvis that has miraculously appeared in water stains on the ceiling of a trailer.
You eat a bowl of beans in order to take a bubble bath.
You fix holes in your truck with duct tape.
You get homesick watching cops.
You get your daily requirement of fiber from toothpicks.
You get your oil changed by your barber.
You give "chinette" as a wedding present.
You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.
You go fishing with a generator and copper wire.
You go to a party and the punch bowl flushes.
You go to the ear, nose, and throat doctor to have your finger removed.
You go to your sister's wedding just to kiss the bride.
You haul more than U-Haul.
You have a beer can crusher mounted on the dashboard of your car.
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
Funny Redneck Jokes In Hindi For Adults In Urdu For Facebook To Text In English For Teenagers Images For Adults Dirty For Kids In Hinid
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